English

Question

Have you ever read Elie Wiesel’s diary? Do you know who he is?
In this essay i will discuss the lesson that Wiesel was trying to teach us! You will want to know a few this first though! So stick around. For one Elie was a survivor of the Holocaust. He experienced a lot. During the holocaust he had watched his friends, family, and other jews be murdered. He didn’t give up. He kept on going. He found it hard to find faith in God. But he managed to keep all of the faith.
Elie Wiesel ( the holocaust survivor) had to watch this friend be murdered his family be murdered. He had to watch his friend literally die out. He lost everyone. But still managed to live.
THIS IS WHAT I GOT SO FAR. is it okay, bad or good, great, on a scale of 1-10

1 Answer

  • I would give you an 7 for this. You have a few punctuation mistakes such as:
    "In this essay i will discuss"
    The I should be capitalized. 
    "But he managed to keep all of the faith."
    You should never start a sentence with but, you should have it as He managed to keep all of his faith.
    "But still manage to live"
    Again, a sentence usually should not start with but, you should try and combine the two sentences this one and the one before for it to be He lost everyone, but he still managed to live.
    "Elie Wiesel (the holocaust survivor) had to watch this friend be murdered and his family be murdered."
    This has a few mistakes, first it is a misspelled word so I will rewrite this for you
    Elie Wiesel (the holocaust survivor) had to watch his friend be murdered as well as his family.

    I hope this helps you!

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